Tag Archives: pronouns

Mutable

“Sometimes I feel like ‘male’ is an island I’m clinging to after being lost at sea.” This is hard for me to write about. It has been a year since I started working in a place where everyone (who didn’t … Continue reading

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A Vignette: Misgendering in Exchange for Queer Visibility

Scene: Me, buying lunch. As I struggle to pull my card out of my wallet (it’s kind of jammed in there), I am aware of the cashier watching my face in a subtle, yet noticeable way. I glance up and … Continue reading

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A Transgender Reflection on the 2014 Annual Sessions of the New England Yearly Meeting of Friends (Quakers)

A note for NEYM folks before you read: This reflection contains criticism of some aspects of Sessions, and I want to make it clear that this is not meant to be a passive aggressive critique, nor is it directed at … Continue reading

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Nametags, Pronouns, and Lifting the Burden

Wintertime, about a week before I was to begin physical transition, I was at a Quaker retreat. At this point in time, folks who didn’t know me consistently and incorrectly presumed I was a cisgender woman, much to my dismay. This is … Continue reading

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Reflections on the Philadelphia Trans-Health Conference, 2014

This past week I attended the first two days of the three-day Philadelphia Trans-Health Conference (PTHC). What an incredible experience. PTHC is an annual, completely free conference for trans* folks, allies, and healthcare providers. There are tons of tables for various … Continue reading

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Perception Anxiety

I often worry that others’ perception of my gender is like that of a computer monitor that has been left on the same screen for too long without a screen saver. When this happens, the screen that has been left … Continue reading

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On Being ‘Other’

I grew up in quite liberal, accepting environments. At one of the schools I went to for many years, the gay kids were the cool kids, not the outcasts. I later went to a women’s college, where there was a … Continue reading

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Optical Gender Illusions: How to Truly See Your Trans* Friend’s Gender

I have entered an ambiguous time in my transition. Like the color of the tiles in the checker shadow illusion, how my gender is perceived is often entirely context dependent. In the checker shadow illusion, shown above, the tiles labeled … Continue reading

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How to Respect and Support A Transgender Person

Wikihow has some good guidelines on this topic, but I wanted to provide something a little more thorough. These are suggestions based on my own experiences, as well as a lot of reading I’ve done of others’ experiences. If you … Continue reading

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Tips For Getting Pronouns Right

1 – If you are not sure of someone’s preferred pronouns, start by avoiding using any to refer to that person. If you have friends or colleagues in common, try asking one of those people if they know what pronouns … Continue reading

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